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Here Comes the Easter Yakko (transcript)

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This is a transcript for Here Comes the Easter Yakko.

  • (The episode begins with Dr. Scratchansniff wearing Seymour S. Sassafras' clothes riding a unicycle on a cliff.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Whoa, WHOAAA! Wagh! Woah, woah! Oh! Look out! Here I come! Whee!
  • (He rides the unicycle off the cliff. He opens up his umbrella and floats down to the ground.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Oh, hello. I am Snapdragon Sammy and company. This is the Snapdragon Sammy, and this (holds out a bag) is the company. I am a peddler by trade. (spills chess pieces out of bag) By trading, by golly, by golly, by golly! (pulls out a big blanket and changes chess pieces to his shop) I sell magic, moonbeams, and pretty colors. Yes, I can sell you anything! I can sell you a perfect pink, (makes background pink), or a blissful blue, (makes background blue), or a euphoric yellow! (makes background yellow and turns it back to normal) That's why I'm in Spring City in Acme Acres so I can give it to Easter Yakko so he can paint his Easter eggs. Hmm? What's that? You've never been to Spring City before? Well, I'll give you a tour. Follow me.
  • (Dr. Scratchansniff shows the viewers Spring City, where characters like Minerva Mink, Skippy, Flavio, Marita, and others are bunnies.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Spring City is where all the cartoon bunnies live and work. (cuts to the Godpigeon and Mr. Skullhead (as bunnies) sculpting chocolate blocks) Here is our finest chocolate sculptors! Meet Mister Skullhead-angelo and Leonardo deGodpigeon.
  • (Dr. Scratchansniff passes the bonnet sewing building.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: And here is where the bonnets are made by our professional bonnet sewers. Everything is nice here, thanks to the Easter Yakko. Hmm? You've never heard of the Easter Yakko? GREAT RAMBLING ROOSTERS! (to his hat) They've never heard of the Easter Yakko!
  • Dr. Scratchansniff's Hat: They've never heard of the Easter Yakko?
  • (Dr. Scratchansniff pulls out a projector.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Why, he is the number one Easter bunny of Acme Acres! (makes a hand shadow of Yakko Warner on the projector) See? You- You mean you never heard how he almost lost the job? Ohh... You actually mean you never heard how an awful and evil rabbit named Coppertail almost became Acme Acres' Easter bunny?
  • (Dr. Scratchansniff makes a hand shadow of Thaddeus Plotz as a bunny on the projector. Cuts to the real bunny version of Thaddeus Plotz at his lair. He is a dark gray bunny. He laughs evilly.)
  • Thaddeus: Monty! Monty! 
  • (Pesto (as a brown bat) flies out of his lair. Thaddeus Plotz gets on top of him and rides him.)
  • Thaddeus: AWAY! AWAY!!!!
  • (Cuts back to Dr. Scratchansniff.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: If you peek into this magic egg, you'll see the entire story. Back then, Easter Yakko was a young whippersnapper of a bunny. 
  • (The camera zooms into the lens of the magic egg. Cuts to Yakko Warner as a bunny hopping down a path holding a basket of eggs.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: ♪Here comes Easter Yakko. Here comes Easter Yakko. Here Comes Easter Yakko on Easter. Here comes Easter Yakko. Here Comes Easter Yakko. If you are not good, he'll kick your keester!♪
  • (Yakko throws an egg at the camera, splattering all over it. The text, "Here Comes Easter Yakko" appear on it. Cuts to a big, hollow, tree trunk-like house which is the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres' house.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: (narrating) It all started on a sunny day in Spring City. The former Easter Bunny of Acme Acres, Colonel Runt, was getting old, and he figured out that he should retire. But it was his duty to find a new Easter Bunny of Acme Acres.
  • (Runt is seen flipping through photos.)
  • Runt: No, no, no, no, no, no, no-(stops at a photo of Yakko) Wait a minute! I think Yakko Warner might be a likely candidate. 
  • (The camera zooms out on him, revealing Pinky as a bunny and standing on a stool.) 
  • Pinky: I don't think so.
  • Runt: Why?
  • (Cuts to Pinky.)
  • Pinky: Because that Warner is boastful, irresponsible, and he sometimes tells a lie. Narf!
  • (Cuts to a shot of Runt and Pinky.)
  • Runt: Well, he isn't perfect. But he has spunk and inginuity.       
  • (Cuts to Runt with Yakko.)
  • Yakko: I never dreamed I would be the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres! (his nose flops)
  • Runt: Yakko, you're lying. Every time you lie, your nose flops.
  • Yakko: Well, I guess I was thinking about the job a few times. (his nose goes up a little bit) Actually a lot. (his nose goes up all the way)
  • Runt: Oh, Yakko, you have to shape up if you want to be the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres. ♪There are lilies to be tended, baskets to be mended, the marshy-mellow chicks are piling up in heaps. The eggs are to be collected and the hens are expecting. The Easter Bunny of Acme Acres never sleeps. The bonnets have to be sewed, the gardens have to be hoed, the chocolate blocks are big in heaps! The colors are flattering and the workers are battering. The Easter Bunny of Acme Acres never sleeps. So get to lily-tending, and get to basket-mending. It's not a game, we're playing this for keeps! Get bow and ribbon-tying and you'll be relying. The Easter Bunny of Acme Acres never sleeps.♪ Never sleeps!
  • (Cuts to Thaddeus Plotz's lair.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: (narrating) But meanwhile, in the most expensive part of Spring City...
  • (Pinky is standing on his stool next to Thaddeus.)
  • Thaddeus: NO! I don't want Warner to be the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres! I deserve that job!
  • Pinky: Really?
  • Thaddeus: Yes. Many years ago, there was this little brat that cut off my tail with his roller blades! Since then, I wore this artificial copper tail, instead of having a fluffy tail like Yakko's!
  • Pinky: But I'm sure it was an accident. Narf! That kid didn't-
  • Thaddeus: JUST SHUT UP! Anyways, since then, I began to hate children.
  • Pinky: Why do you want to be the Easter bunny of Acme Acres then?
  • Thaddeus: So I can have my revenge. When I get that job, children will no longer bother us anymore!
  • (Thaddeus laughs evilly as he heads towards Pesto. He gets on top and rides him. Cuts to Runt giving an Easter basket to Yakko.)
  • Runt: Okay, Yakko. Here is your official Easter basket. Whatever you do, carry it with pride.
  • Yakko: Okay! (takes Easter basket) Gotcha there!
  • Runt: I dub thee Yakko official Easter bunny of Ac-
  • Thaddeus: Hold it! 
  • (Thaddeus lands Pesto next to Yakko and Runt.)
  • Thaddeus: I've got something to show you!
  • Runt: What, Coppertail?
  • Thaddeus: This (pulls out the Constitution of Spring City) is the Constitution of Spring City. It says right here that whoever delivers the most eggs will be the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres.
  • Runt: HEY! I ALREADY KNOW-
  • Thaddeus: I also know that Yakko is just plain terrible at delivering Easter eggs and I, Mr. Thaddeus Coppertail, am probably the best! I declare a contest of who can deliver the most eggs.
  • Runt: Yakko is great at delivering eggs, but I don't think-
  • Yakko: Colonel Runt! I'm not afraid of Coppertail! I am sure I can beat him!
  • Thaddeus: Hmmph! Yeah right.
  • Runt: Yakko, this is not the perfect time to brag!
  • Yakko: I am not bragging, a contest is the most fair way!
  • Runt: Okay, Yakko. A contest it is!
  • (Cuts to Yakko, Runt, and Thaddeus on stage in front of the other citizens of Spring City.)
  • Runt: Attention everyone! Whoever delivers the most eggs tomorrow, will be the Easter Bunny of Acme Acres!
  • (Everyone cheers.)
  • Runt: Now listen here, Yakko. You have to win. If Coppertail wins, he'll do bad things to Spring City. Get up bright and early tomorrow.
  • (Cuts to Yakko sneaking into a building to party.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Yakko thought that he would win and that night and he had a party. And he went to bed late.
  • (Cuts to Yakko going to bed setting his alarm clock.)
  • Yakko: Chicken Boo, wake me up tomorrow at 5:00 a.m.  I hope I win tomorrow. (falls asleep)
  • (Thaddeus is flying on Pesto to Yakko's house and sneaks in.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: (narrating) But then Coppertail decided to sabatoge Yakko's plans.
  • Thaddeus: Hey, wake up, little chicken! 
  • (Chicken Boo wakes up.)
  • Thaddeus: This is for you. (holds out some corn-flavored peanut butter)
  • Chicken Boo: Buk-awk! (eats the peanut butter) 
  • Thaddeus: (goes outside) Yes! I am going to rule Spring City! 
  • (Thaddeus laughs evilly as he flies away on Pesto. Cuts to morning where Chicken Boo tries to cluck loudly to wake Yakko up.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: (narrating) That peanut butter was magic peanut butter. The kind of peanut butter that would seal an alarm clock chicken's lips. Yakko never heard his clucking and never woke up. (cuts to Thaddeus walking around a field looking around) No one wanted eggs from Coppertail, so he only gave away only one egg. (Thaddeus gives an egg to a sleeping Ralph) But Yakko gave away zero, because he slept in, so Coppertail now ruled Spring City.
  • (Thaddeus is on stage in front of the citizens of Spring City. It is windy out.)
  • Thaddeus: ♪No more tulip tending, start tulip bending! Stop the marshmallow chicks from piling up in heaps! For the hens that need egg collecting, give them no protecting! The Easter Bunny of Acme Acres always sleeps!♪ And I have changed the rules. Instead of giving children eggs, give them rocks instead! And you, chocolate sculptors! Make dark chocolate sculptures of snakes instead of milk chocolate bunnies! And I declare a total ban to bonnets! Instead, there'll be Easter buttons! ♪No more children to bother us! They are a bunch of grossness! The Easter Bunny of Acme Acres always sleeps!♪
  • (Cuts to Yakko sadly walking away from Spring City. He is in a dark and rainy forest.)
  • Yakko: I can't believe I let Coppertail rule Spring City! But I will make it up to them, but I'm too tired right now.
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: (narrating) And with that, Yakko fell asleep on a nearby rock. The next morning, he magically appeared in my garden where I came into the story.
  • (Yakko wakes up and sees Dr. Scratchansniff.)
  • Yakko: Oh, hi there. Who are you?
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Well, the name is Snapdragon Sammy!
  • Yakko: Well, it's good to meet you Sammy. Where am I?
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: You're in the place where all the colors for your eggs come from! The Garden of Colors! It grows pink lettuces, blue carrots, red peas, and green potatoes. (leads Yakko to a vegetable grinder) And this is how your colors are made. First, I put in a colorful vegetable like a purple tomato. Then, I put it in this vegetable grinder and grind it up.
  • (Dr. Scratchansniff grinds the purple tomato in the grinder and purple liquid pours out into a jar.)
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: And finally, I label the jar (labels jar "purple") and I send it to Spring City!
  • Yakko: Sammy, I don't think that Spring City will be the same. Coppertail is the ruler of it. 
  • Dr. Scratchansniff: Well, Yakko, I have the invention that will solve your problem! (shows him a time machine) This is the Time-Transporter  3000! It'll have you go into anytime like yesterday, tomorrow, or even a holiday! And let me introduce you to the pilot.
  • (A caterpillar with Wakko's head, shirt, and arms comes out of the time machine.)
  • Wakko: Hello!
  • Yakko: Seriously? This caterpillar's the pilot?

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